A Managua Timeline.

Our intentions for travelling to Managua were certainly not for pleasure so, in an effort to give you the full effect of our experience, I think the best way to convey these two days, is to do it over a timeline.

Wednesday July 7th

400pm (still in Gigante) - Gardener Felix, tells us that it is going to pour rain overnight.  Knowing that a) we are leaving for Managua in the morning and that b) our passport stamps expire on the 8th and that c) the river out of Gigante is impassible after a storm, we d) pray that he is wrong.

600pm - We run out of gas while buying eggs at the pulperia.

605pm - Ian borrows a motorcycle to purchase two gallons of gas at the church up the road.

620pm - It begins to pour rain.

700pm - the power goes out.

Thursday July 8th

600am - it is still pouring.

700am - We decide that the river is impassable and sleep a little longer hoping that the rain will stop, the river will go down, and that we can leave by nine or ten.

830am - the rain stops, Felix the gardener arrives for the day, and tells us that in fact, the river is "not that bad."

930am - we lock the dogs in the bottom part of the casita, beg for them to not do anything stupid, then leave for Managua.  We cross the river with no problems.

1000am - we drive past the Guacalito pulperia, decide to turn around to purchase one more gallon of gas to ensure that we make it to Rivas.

1005am - Lady Grey starts making suspicious noises.

1010am - we decide that it is a possibility that the afore mentioned pulperia, put diesel in our gasoline engine.

1015am - the car is still making suspicious noises like a) she is running out of gas again or b) she is pissed off because she is ingesting diesel instead of gasoline.

1020am - we find some random house on the side of the road in Tola who will sell us another gallon of gasoline.

1025am - the car is still making suspicious noises but runs smoothly in fourth gear but we opt to stop at our mechanic's house, who is on our way out of town anyways.  Good thing ...

1030am - mechanic tells us that in fact, we DO have a little bit of diesel in our tank and that it IS in fact, bad.  He checks the spark plugs.  Two have been fried from the diesel.

1031am - Ian tells Melissa that she should always double check to make sure that the eleven year old kid who is putting liquid into your gas tank out of a recycled plastic Coca-Cola bottle is, for sure, putting gasoline, not diesel, into your engine.

1032am - Melissa gets pissed at Ian because she feels like he is blaming her for the diesel in the tank, even though she asked for gasoline and the eleven year old kid's mom, told him to put gasoline in our tank.

1033am - Ian apologizes to Melissa.

1035am - Mechanic replaces the plugs and tells us to put more gas in our tank and to let the diesel work its way out.

1100am - We arrive in Rivas, put forty dollars worth of gas in our tank, go to the ATM and call our Managua driver Robert Ow, whom we are meeting just outside of the city, to be escorted into the mouth of the beast, where we can ditch our car at the hostel we are staying at, then get driven around to do our errands.  We tell him we'll be in Managua by one.

1130am - we get pulled over by the national police.  All our documents are in order, we present our fire extinguisher and safety triangles and he lets us go without having to bribe him.  A small miracle.

1200pm - we go the wrong way in the Masaya region.

1230pm - we realize we have gone the wrong way.  This may have been Melissa's fault even though she chooses not to acknowledge this fact.  Ian is irritated with her but keeps his mouth shut this time.  They sit in silence for a half hour until both are over it.

100pm - we call our Managua driver and tell him that we have gone the wrong way and that we would be entering the city from the southwest.  He sounds disappointed but slightly humored by our mistake, and arranges for a new place to meet us.  He tells us we have gone WAY out of our way.

200pm - we meet Robert in front of a Shell station off the highway and he escorts into the city.  We see our first stoplights in three months.

230pm - a very drunk homeless man is taking a piss on the building next to our hostel.

231pm - we buzz the hostel's front door and the very drunk homeless man runs past us, through the hostel's front door.  We become very skeptical of our chosen location.

232pm - we find out that the very drunk homeless man is a guest at the hostel.

233pm - very drunk homeless man breaks beer bottle on floor of reception hall.

234pm - we become even more skeptical of our chosen location, but don't care enough to change it.  We see our room which is very, very small and smells like piss and cigs. We park our car in their gates and get into the more luxurious ride of Robert Ow's.  Robert tells us he is from the Corn Islands and we like his accent very much.

300pm - we arrive at Tecnosol.  They have one propane refrigerator.  It is exactly what we are looking for and it costs two thousand, one hundred and seventy six dollars.  We buy it because we don't really have a choice and are well aware that the only other solar store in Managua does not have what we are looking for.  We throw in a rechargeable fan for an extra fifty dollars and arrange to have the fridge delivered on Friday.  We are relieved that we even found this illusive appliance without any hassle.

330pm - we celebrate at McDonald's.  We crush multiple cheeseburgers and a boatload of fries.  Fountain Coke never tastes so good.

400pm - we arrive at PriceMart.  It blows our minds because, as we find out shortly after our arrival, it is, in fact, Costco.  We haven't seen anything like it since Hawaii and we are excited over things like organic cotton sheets, fancy knife sets, industrial shelving, ranch dressing, Grey Poupon, and above all Kraft American Singles.

500pm - we check out with a three hundred and fifty dollar bill.  We quickly realize that we need to leave the city or we will be headed back to Hawaii sooner than expected.

520pm - Robert shows us the correct way to exit the city and tells us how to get to La Colonial so we can buy  fancy groceries on the way out of town.  By fancy I mean, anything other than the menial items they sell at the only grocery store in Rivas.

525pm - We transfer our items from Robert's car to ours, thank him for his services and go inside the hostel to drink a beer.

530pm - We walk to Metro Centro which is only two blocks from our hostel and inquire about getting our passports stamped.  We realize they close in a half hour and decide to deal with it in the morning.  Because Metro Centro is a mall, we weave in and out of stores looking for typical, new house knick knacks.  We buy a dustpan with its own small sweeper, some tongs, a bunch of clips to close things like bags of flour or sugar, a shower curtain and rod, and a knife sharpener.

600pm - we indulge in the blended goodness of mocha frappes.

630pm - we buy tickets to the only movie they have in English because we are too tired to decipher an entire flick in Spanish.  The movie is Kick-Ass which we have already seen but don't care because it kicks ass.

815pm - we choose to have dinner at the fancy hotel next to Metro Centro because we feel like we deserve it and whats another fifty bucks after spending 2500?  We immediately order a half bottle of rum, a chicken caeser and a bowl of French onion soup followed by a steak with mashed potatoes and steamed vegetables.  They continually bring us fresh ice and more cokes for our cocktails and do things like replace silverware in anticipation of the next course.  Melissa believes that they could use this type of help at Indigo.  Our total bill - forty two dollars including tip.

930pm - we debate whether or not to take a cab the two blocks to our hostel because we question the safety of the neighborhood.  Then we question the safety of a cab.  We choose to run the first block, then fast walk the rest of the way.  We make it unscathed and unrobbed.

945pm - we watch cable in English until we fall asleep.  Melissa notices a pubic hair stuck into the paint on the wall next to her head and a mysterious dried-up brownish splash accompanying it.

300am - Melissa screams, and I mean screams, out of a dead sleep.  She is having a bad dream.  A very bad dream indeed.  Ian holds her and tells her everything is going to be ok.  He turns the TV back on to purge the demons from the room and Melissa tells Ian she thinks someone has been murdered in this room and that it is for sure, haunted.

Friday July 9th

800am - we get the fuck out of the hostel that we will never come to ever again.

830am - McDonald's again.  Mmmm.  Egg Mc Muffins and hash browns with piping hot coffee.

840am - Melissa clogs McDonald's toilet and we leave immediately thereafter.

900am - arrive at Metro Centro again to check out the passport scene.  A line of people occupying plastic chairs has already begun to form, an hour before they open.  We join the line of plastic chairs.

945am - the scene becomes very intense as more people arrive and start crowding the front of the line, indifferent to the crowd who had already been waiting for an hour.

946am - we question the morals of people in third world countries and hate on their line tactics.  We decide that Melissa will stand near the front in case a mad rush occurs, and Ian will remain in the line of plastic chairs.

1000am - a lady from the office comes out with forms and a mad rush occurs.  The line remains somewhat intact and we are thankful to be very near the front.  A horrible woman and her teenage child who both manage to bud their way to the front, get accosted by the Spanish women around them.  They are shamed and hang their heads but do not leave.  The women in front of us actually tattle on them to the lady in charge.

1100am - we leave with passports stamped.  Ninety more days in Nicaragua if our bank account allows it.  We are ready to get the hell out of dodge.

1130am - Ian begins to drive out of the city.  On the way out we stop at the Galleria which is Managua's fancy mall.  At a Macy's equivalent, Melissa falls to her knees in love.  They have all her missing kitchen items.  French Press, salad spinner, 9x13 pan, loaf pan, 9x9 brownie pan with fresh-top, measuring spoons, measuring cups, bread knife, a cookie sheet and some other random items.  One-hundred dollars later - Melissa can bake again.

1200pm - We stop at La Colonial.  Again, mind-blowing.  They have ten different varietals of lettuce and produce we haven't seen since we left - i.e. asparagus.  We seriously stock up because we are not allowed to do anything or go anywhere until we leave in October.  Two-hundred and forty dollars worth of groceries gets charged to our Visa, because we can.

100pm - we are officially on our way out of Managua.  We pull off the side of the road in Masaya to buy two hammocks.

200pm - we arrive in Masatepe to find that all the artisans have collectively decided to raise their furniture prices.  Our set that was $350 two months ago, is now $650.  We cannot afford this and nothing will bring these ladies down.  We are very disappointed and curse their business tactics.

230pm - we stop at one more shotty-looking shop in a last ditch effort.  They sell us a couch and coffee table for $250 and we are pleased.  The couch gets strapped to the roof with twine and the table gets wedged into the already full car.

430pm - we arrive in Rivas to purchase one more propane tank for our oven.  The tank only fits at Melissa's feet and she is now pancaked to the front seat.

445pm - we are relieved that we are close to home.  We buy some beers and drink them on the very slow, very bumpy road home.

600pm - we arrive at La Vista and unload the car.  Seth and Lindsey come up from Iguana to help us.  They have tequila in them and are very anxious to help.  We love them very much for this.

700pm - we drive back to Gigante to drop off some Pricemart items for Swell and eat dinner before heading back up to Chanelle's.

800pm - We arrive back home to the dogs who are both surprisingly calm with no signs of defecation on the floor.

The Resurrection of Lady Gray, The Great Gigante Dog Roundup, and Running Water at the House

To start things off today, Lady Gray is back in action.  We're so happy to be mobile again.  We had a mechanic named Douglas come up from Rivas to take a look at the clutch and it turned out to be a cracked seal.  He returned to Rivas that morning, found the part, and four and half hours later, we drove to Amarillo for an evening session and sunset beers.  All said and done, eighty dollars.  The parts were forty and he only wanted twenty-five for the labor.  We gave him the extra fifteen and assured him that he was officially "our guy."  Douglas also brought his friend along who is a jack of all trades.  While the car was being repaired, he fixed Chanelle's water pump, a couple of busted fans, and one of the electrical sockets in our casita.  All and all, it was a very productive day.

If you may recall from earlier posts, the woman whom we are renting from, is one of the world's biggest animal lovers.  She had recently informed us of an organization named World Vets that do free spay and neuter clinics in foreign countries.  This week they were in Rivas and it was Chanelle's goal to round up some stray Gigante dogs and get them fixed.  So, on Tuesday morning, we went down to a couple of local eateries and asked the owners if we could take their patio pooches and get them checked out and fixed up by some volunteer vets.  The Nica families handed us over a couple of girl pups, and a male pup named Tarzan.  We also had Chanelle's four month old boxer pup with us too.  We transported the dogs in Lady Gray and checked them into the clinic around noon.  We did some shopping in Rivas and while we were at the Texaco, Chanelle came back to the car with a mangled street dog wrapped up in a sheet, looking like a scene straight out of ET.  The poor dog was the worst case the clinic had seen yet.  His nose was caked with mucus, he was covered in ticks and the poor guy seemed like he hadn't eaten in months.  Well, wouldn't you know it, "Tex" is here at the house today.  Chanelle opted to stay at the clinic to make sure Tex checked out, and we returned to Gigante with the dogs from Margarita's and Gaviota's.  Ian and I were a little concerned about the interaction we were going to have with the local families when we handed over their drugged up puppies but, his Spanish proved worthy enough because the smiles the Nicas gave us were priceless.  Five new fixed dogs in Gigante equals a hundred unborn, uncared for puppies.  Thanks to Chanelle for being the motivation in what turned out to be, a very cool day.

Check in at the Rivas School of Agriculture and the World Vet Clinic

Gaviota's pup, Tarzan - also one of Lea's beach lovers

Tarzan getting tagged

Tex getting poked and prodded

Tex - look at his nails!

Recovery Room

Surgery Room

Tarzan and Taj on their drugged-up ride back to Gigante

In house news, we have water!!!  We also have walls, a shower, and a couple more plants in the ground.  It sounds like we'll have windows and doors by next week too.  The guys were working on a leech line for the septic tank when we stopped by yesterday.  We had our first porch Toñas to celebrate.  La Vista is so green now.  It rained a ton last night.  I can't wait to lay in a hammock on the front porch with a breeze coming through the valley, hearing only the sound of rustling leaves.  Ahh, serenity.  

 

Ian in our bedroom window

Shower

Our little Plumeria Tree

Water!!!

walls

Leech line coming from the septic tank

Our first porch Toñas

This week in surf, Melly finally scored good waves at Pangas.  It actually dropped to a size where I could sit inside and feel comfortable and I got one really good left and a handful of fun rights.  Pangas and I are now friends.  Well everyone, I'm finally getting bagel making down and today I'm experimenting with onion topping.  The dough has risen and I'm off to the kitchen.  Cheers!      

   

Itchy in Gigante

It's been a fairly uneventful week with the exception of Lady Gray experiencing her first real mechanical issues in our time of ownership.  The clutch is leaking and we're officially on foot again.  Uggggh.  How spoiled and lazy one becomes.  A mechanic was supposed to come take a look at it today, but apparently he was having troubles with his motorbike.  I'm not sure if we should be weary of that fact or not but regardless, Monday is the day as few Nicaraguans work on Sunday.   In the meantime, we are dangerously close to being out of propane, our Gigante money stash is tapped out and our food rations are dwindling.  If anyone is going to Rivas like, tomorrow, please let us know.  We need a ride.  Seriously.

There has been a lot of progress on the house this week.  The drywall is being hung, the spaces between the floorboards have been filled, the water should already be connected and the electrical sockets have been installed, but not wired.  We bought some more plants at the Rivas School of Agriculture including two plumeria trees (the official flower of Nicaragua) and an avocado tree.  We also bought a bunch of Eureka palms to line the front of the deck which will also hide the underside of the house.  I hope Ian's dad Jon, is smiling.  We know how you love those Eurekas!  All in all, it seems to be coming along much quicker these days.  The most recent debate is whether or not to buy a very expensive propane refrigerator, or to buy an equally priced second solar panel to power a much more inexpensive electric fridge.  We seem to be leaning in the direction of the latter.  As the time of move-in draws nearer, these are the conversations that have ensued.  Admittedly, very exciting.

On the surf front, there was a fairly decent swell this week.  Ian scored some mackers at Pangas.  I finally busted out my 6'3" rounded pin and am in love.  I can't believe it took me this long to ride it.  Not to mention, there are a pair of penguins on the underside of it and two half naked ladies staring up at me from the nose.  It has a much different artistic air to it than the demented skull of my Lost fish.  And it's faster.  I got a great feel for it at Amarillo over the last couple of days and have been having better luck going left.  Yea for new surfboards!!!

And finally, let's talk bugs.  I'm not sure which of the foul creatures I should start with.  We stomped out another scorpion running across the floor of our bedroom last week.  The flies have been absolutely atrocious.  Yesterday, as I was making another batch of bagels, I became so maddened that I finally resorted to Anna's mom's ancient Chinese fly detractor trick - a clear plastic bag filled with water and pennies hung on the wall over the butcher block.  That, and half a bottle of Raid seemed to do the trick which incidentally, led to Puna devouring their insecticide-coated carcasses scattered all over the kitchen floor.  Raid is like candy to her!  Then there are the beetles.  Two inch beetles that somehow slip through the window cracks and explode entrails when you smash them.  Then there are the locusts.  Last night there was some weird cross between a giant horned beetle and the largest roach known to mankind trailing four-inch antennas on either side.  In our bedroom.  We thought he was dead, but this afternoon as he lay on his back near the doorway, his arms were still moving - ten hours after his initial blow.  And worst of all, the zancudos.  Smaller than a gnat, these f*#^ers bite and you can't even see them.  Everyone in Gigante is covered in bites.  Itchy bites.  Very itchy bites.  And last but not least, there was the poisonous snake that Felix slaughtered in the yard the other day.  Ah, the tropics.  At least we're not working.

Un Sabado Perisoso

It's a lazy Saturday morning for me.  I've been catching up on emails and praying for some rain.  The sky is grey for the first time today and it seems like a possibility.  Ian left this morning on a biking adventure to La Vista.  Rich's brother is in town and they are meeting to brainstorm some ideas for a deli/convenient store at the entrance of the neighborhood.  The fruit truck just stopped by and I picked up a few more avocados for Ian's world famous guacamole and purchased the biggest papaya I have ever seen.  Juanita is doing some of our laundry on the cement washboard outside of Chanelle's house and she looks like a baker when she works, kneading the clothes like a ball of dough.

Yesterday, Chanelle let Jason, Ian and I borrow her truck to go into Rivas and take care of a few errands.  On our way into town, we got stopped at a checkpoint and received a good old-fashioned hassling.  First, he wanted all of our passports which of course, none of us had.  (We were also traveling with two German girls)  Jason calmly explained to the police that it's not safe to carry around our passports and that only Immigrations can legally ask for them.  He provided the officer with his CA driver's license as identification and convinced the officer that a DL should be sufficient.  Then, the officer asked for registration and insurance, which he produced, but one of the documents was expired.  When Jason explained that it wasn't his vehicle, and that it was our friend Chanelle's, he asked Jason to call Chanelle so he could talk to her.  As Jason was calling her, the officer hassled him even more for not having a mandatory fire extinguisher or hazard triangles in the vehicle.  A short talk with Chanelle and a ten dollar bribe had us on our way again.  Classic.  I guess ten dollars can buy almost anything down here.  

Except for a car.  The Isuzu we saw in Rivas was a piece of shit.  One look at it, and we knew immediately.  The truck bed was almost rusted off, the shocks were shot and one of the tires was completely bald.  Plus, it was an American car and it ran on gasoline.  $2500????  Loco.  We caught wind of another car for sale in Gigante that is owned by a well-to-do, local woman and has been maintained meticulously.  We got to drive it when we returned and she's a beaut - not beat to hell like most of the other vehicles in the area.  It's a Nica Toyota Landcruiser with tinted windows, a tight clutch, nice paint and a solid, solid motor.  We heard she was selling it for five grand but when we asked her, she told us eight.  We explained we had heard differently and that eight was well over our budget.  It's her husband's truck and apparently they have a new car being shipped over in a month.  She told us she didn't care how much they got rid of it for, and that she'd talk to her husband.  I know I'm nuts over Land Cruisers, but without any bias, this is a solid rig.  Ian and I both really want it and hope they'd be willing to let it go for a significant amount less.  Maybe it's a pipe dream, but everyone keep their fingers crossed.  She's exactly what we're looking for.      

I pause this blog entry to give you a brief weather update:  Yeah!!!!!  Live, from Nicaragua ... our first clap of thunder!  The dogs, Felix, Juanita and I are going crazy!!!!  How exciting!!!!  Rain is so desperately needed!  Hopefully, it's not just heat thunder.

We got a couple more essential items in Rivas yesterday.  We've been cooking with salt and red wine vinegar for the last ten days and were stoked to get inside information on some American-aimed grocery stores.  We were able to pick up some very expensive olive oil and balsamic vinagrette, a few spices and some Kraft macaroni and cheese which we scarfed up for dinner last night.  Ian got super ambitious and made some homemade jalapeño poppers which came out really well for his first attempt.  Unfortunately, he learned the hard way about rubbing your face after cutting up spicy peppers.  He had even more trouble this morning after he replaced his contacts and spent breakfast with burning eyeballs.  My poor babe.  He's also been taking the brunt of mosquito feasts.  They seem to love his tall, white blood.  Apparently, he went into an itch fit in the middle of the night last night.  Our Benadryl and Hydrocortizone cream are going quickly.  

On the surf front, Amarillo, Amarillo, Amarillo.  My new PP.  I love Amarillo.  It's low stress and playful.  My favorite kind of surfing.  The waves have been really fun at high tide over the last couple of days.  The local boys put on quite a show out there.  They can get multiple turns, all fins out, and mini barrels on knee-high waves.  Super, super impressive.  The water has been ultra clear and huge schools of fish swim through the lineup while giant fish make random appearances on the sandy bottom.  The jellyfish were out two days ago and we all of received multiple stings but it didn't hurt that bad at all.  Certainly not bad enough to get any of us out of the water.  I'm happy to have this spot and did a real live little floater yesterday.  Woohoo!  I rip.  My stoke is back.

Anyways, it's Ian's turn to throw rocks at the cows tonight, it's my turn to wash the dogs this afternoon, and it's my turn to set up our makeshift entertainment center for pre-bed movie time.  Rum and cokes for sunset on the porch and chicken stirfry for dinner tonight.  Life is good.  An Ian update coming soon ...